Have you ever looked at a map and pondered throwing a dart, with the intent of packing everything (and everybody) up and just moving wherever it landed?
Strange idea, I know — but Polimom’s been thinking of doing just that. (Well… okay, maybe not a random dart. There are a number of areas that I’d want to avoid, and there are others for which I’d actually aim.)
I have, in fact, been sharpening my darts this week; I spent all of yesterday online, looking through my electronic window at towns and cities thousands of miles from here, trying to figure out where I want to spend the rest of my life. Cuz it ain’t here.
Unfortunately, I’m not sure where “there” is, either. Polimom, DH, and AC are rootless in America.
Polimom yearns for her youth — not the specifics, but the environment. I’m tired of big cities, flat horizons (“Look! It’s Mt. Levee!”), and homogenous tract housing. I miss larger lots and smaller towns, where people walk the sidewalks, sit on porches, and know their neighbors…
Sadly, Polimom’s family is like most of the others I know; divorce and relocation have broken our geographic and ancestral ties. There’s no family home where holiday get-togethers are hosted, no church where our lives are recorded, no neighborhood where my face is recognized…
I resent these losses, frankly, but I can’t do anything about it, and Polimom’s nothing if not pragmatic.
The family homesteads are gone, but the dream is not. Better lives for our children, firm commitment to family, pride in achievement… these are unchanged. What is different (at least for Polimom), is how I define “better”.
For me, it isn’t a big fancy house, an accumulation of “things”, or ever-higher piles of dollars. It’s that sense of belonging, not just to one’s family, but to a neighborhood, community, and way of life.
We’re going to have to start anew, but I know we can; it’s been done before, many times over.
I want to go home to America.
Rootless in America
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May I suggest Algiers Point?
🙂
Screw America.
Move to New Orleans.
Ahhh yes… I know how you feel. That’s why I moved back to N.O. some years ago.
Yes, have a long way to go in making this place safe and rebuilding, but I’m groovin’ on the on the fact that many here are “coming together”.
I hope your dart comes this way!
I know what your saying, Poli.. I’m thinking of leaving ‘da quarters, working as a carpenter in a shop in da 9’th ward..And heading to Nebraska..And it will probably happen when the landlord raises my rent again (Twice since Katrina) I’ve been 30 years here..But I refuse to raise my prices to my customers because I’m screwed by a landlord.. I’ll move..
.. edit.. Don’t know why I said Nebraska..I was thinking of Polimom’s dart comment..And Nebraska poppped up in my head.. 🙂
I remember when we’d discussed this earlier. Sorry to hear that you’re feeling such a lack of connection. As an Army brat, I never felt connected anywhere — I just married into my wife’s connections (she was born and raised in one area). In some ways I regret that default decision, and wish I had the freedom to plant my flag wherever I might choose. Hawaii? Montana? Colorado? Arizona? Many places are better than this DC sprawl … yet here we stay.
Difficult as it may be, good for you to seek a better life for you and yours.
New Orleans is — and will always be — in my heart; DH and I have frequent discussions about moving back. After posting this, I went (yet again) to the real estate listings and homes available, and I was reminded yet again of the incredible architectural value embodied in NOLA. It’s unique, and absolutely priceless.
There are, I’m afraid, some roadblocks in the way of us moving back… or rather, for me. I need to write about that very, very soon.
Simplify. Just get a map of New Orleans and practice dart throwing at that. It is, after all, the most American city.
I understand how you feel – and I am a native Houstonian, as are my YF and son. There are times I am tempted to up and move somewhere – around Grand Teton often comes to mind, as does Alaska – but there are things that prevent me from making the move, among them the need to earn a living (sigh.)
~EdT.
I fear the place you seek no longer exists in America. Technology has changed us. The front porch has been replaced by cable TV; the neighborhood by My Space and other internet based “friends” networks; gossip over the back fence by chat rooms; the village green or neighborhood park by the food court at the mall or soccer and t-ball at the school or Y.
I grew up in Iowa, which by definition means small town America. Most of my family resides there. They still have sidewalks and front porches, mostly uninhabited. We grew up playing baseball, football and basketball in our backyards. None of this seems to happen even in Iowa. With technology only a satellite dish or phone jack away, not even Iowa is immune to the isolation caused by modern communications.
I wish you well in your search. Perhaps you could find a group of like minded persons through the internet.
Polimom, I’m sorry if my “rascalness” at your chron.com site wasn’t part of this situation.
I’m also sorry you don’t feel at home where you are. I hope there’s someplace you’ll find soon that will. But also remember, wherever you are will always be your kids home. And no matter what they say on a daily bases changes that in the long run.
The Hill Country, near Leakey, Fredericksburg, or Junction is a beautiful area and still not too populated. Kids still swim in clear, spring-fed rivers (70 degrees on a 94-degrees summer day) and folks in town know your name (and business *L*).
Whatever you do, wherever you go, try to be happy inside. Because until you’re happy there, you’ll never be happy anywhere.
God bless and keep you near His heart and in His arms.
EDIT:
Polimom, I’m sorry if my “rascalness” at your chron.com site was part of this situation.
Just keep in mind AC’s sentiments. Mine are forebearing quite well, but miss their friends in Fargo. I know that will change once school starts, but it’s been a long hot summer. If NOCCA and NOBA weren’t dancing my daughter near to death, and I wasn’t shelling out more bucks than I’d rather for all day Tae Kwon Do day camp for my son, I think they would have gone feral like the children in Lord of the Flies and offering up my well-tied self on a flaming pyre to the Great Tube of Forgetfulness.
Mark and Ashley — both of y’all are dealing with part of my problem regarding New Orleans: schools.
My memories of school in NOLA are… well… not very good. I’ve been following the chartering, state takeovers, etc etc (all of which have potential for great good), but there’s not nearly enough information yet to know how that will play out.
Not only that, but AC’s gifted, and while I know Ben Franklin is back, I don’t know what’s going on at the lower levels (like Middle School…)
Da Po Boy did a great post about the logistics, too, a few days ago.
Any feedback (or posts) on how that’s going would be read with interest… (smile).